Life and Business Update

Yeah… about that last blog post at Christmas, where I was going to get life going again…. I didn’t end up hitting the ground running in 2022. This year took a bit of a run at my husband and me.

First of all - I’m ok.

I’m still dealing with some after effects of treatment, but I’ve made it through two mammograms free and clear! I currently have an unfortunate haircut that makes it LOOK like I’m not doing so well. I liked how my hair looked when it came back and wanted to continue to keep it short. Then I started taking a medication and it thinned out my hair. I have a whole different texture going on now. I didn’t realize how bad it was until I asked for a pixie and ended up with a buzz cut instead. I’m not complaining - t’s a small price to play to put cancer behind me. And the hair situation may change again. I talked to someone that happened to. But what I do know is that my hair will grow again. :)

The Murmur..

In January, my husband, Chris, went to a new PCP who discovered a heart murmur. Well, his last PCP discovered it and just asked “does it bother you?” and left it at that. This PCP did an EKG and ordered an echocardiogram. My husband is an average sized 51 year old. He’s not what you visualize as a “heart patient”. So, we were shocked a month later when he received a diagnosis of severe aortic valve stenosis. He’s an educator - he’s always been very active at work. It made sense that he would come home exhausted. We didn’t see it as unusual, but it was a symptom.

After a series of tests, It turned out to be a birth defect, a bicuspid valve, that caused the issue. He had no other heart disease whatsoever, which was wonderful news. So the valve would just need to be replaced. These days a valve can be replaced through an artery in the leg. You can do that a couple times. But valves last 10-15 years. He would need more than a couple to see him through.

When you’ve broken into your 50’s, and society is telling you that you’re old, it’s weird to hear how young you are. The same thing happened to me last year. Because he was young and healthy, he had to have a more invasive procedure. Better now than when you’re in your 60’s. It could have been open heart surgery. The tests revealed that he could receive a thoracotomy, which is dictated by the location of your organs. I always said his heart was in the right place! A thoracotomy is less invasive, but more painful and came with 5 days in the hospital and 12 weeks of recovery time.

The Surgery…

Chris had his surgery on March 25th. Eight years prior, on March 26th, my dad had surgery to correct the same problem, along with a couple other issues. My dad passed on March 30th due to complications after that surgery. He was 73. He also had a number of health issues. I told myself the situations were completely different. And they were. But the mental load was incredibly heavy.

His surgery went beautifully. His recovery wasn’t the smoothest, but he’s doing great now. I know I’m not saying a lot. Chris is a private person and I’ve probably said too much already.

The last year and a half has been challenging to say the least. We celebrated being back on a “normal” track with a trip to Niagara Falls, Ontario in July.

So what is “normal”? After a pandemic, cancer and heart surgery, I’m not quite sure. But I look forward to finding out. Read on to see where things stand…

The Reboot….

I kept my current clients going through all of this - and I am now accepting new clients! If you or someone you know is in need of graphic design support - bring it on! Book covers are one of my favorite projects to work on. So if you’ve finished the book you started over the pandemic, or if you can put me in contact with a book publisher, please let me know!

 

The Journal…

COMING SOON

After working on other people’s books, I wanted to put something out there for myself. I took inspiration from Niagara Falls and designed a journal about persistence. I wanted a tool to help me focus. So I made one which will be available on amazon.com.

 

The Book…

COMING … SOON?

In my prior posts I mentioned that I might write a book about my experience last year. And I am. I had started it when the turmoil of this year occurred. I wasn’t in a good headspace to write, but I’m getting back to it. But I did the book cover to make it real. My journal will keep me on track to finish it!

 

The Program…

This is a coaching concept I came up with during the pandemic, and I’ve finally launched it. An eight week program to improve design skills. If you or someone you know is the victim of bad design… drop them the link.

 

Thank You…

Thank you for reading all of this. If you’re a friend or client, thank you for your interest in me and your patience as I tried to lay low and practice some self-care (and husband care) through all of this. I look forward to seeing you again as I emerge from this chapter in my life.

If this is the first time you’ve read about me, welcome! Stick around and get to know more about me!

Forgive the old picture - once I figure out what my hair wants to do, I’ll get new ones. :)

Cancer is behind me.

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On January 14th 2021 I got a routine mammogram. It was delayed first by neglect - then a pandemic. That day I had a mammogram, then an ultrasound, then a biopsy.

The following Monday our lives changed with the call that no one wants. Tears came. My husband’s anger came. The shock of my family and friends followed. A general fear settled over all of us.

After many scans, pokes and prods, it was determined that I had the most common kind of breast cancer (invasive ductal carcinoma), and it was a lazy cancer. Good news as bad news goes. But it liked to travel a little, though - it had spread to a lymph node. So THE PLAN was for chemo first, then surgery and radiation to follow.

Once I had THE PLAN, I thought I would put something out on Facebook. Then I held off and ultimately decided not to do that. I realized I didn’t want to hear all the “stories”.

My docs told me that every cancer is very different. Unfortunately, a lot of people either have - or knows someone who has - a cancer story. A mom, aunt, cousin…all different stories. So when I told people in my “circle of trust” about my diagnosis, I asked them not to tell me those stories. Those stories weren’t mine. I wanted to let my own story unfold. Why be scared of situations I might never have? Things were scary enough as it was.

That being said, I decided that anger and fear were not helpful in this process. This gave me a more zen way through this chapter of my life. I chose my words carefully. I didn’t have a ‘battle”, “fight like a girl”, or “kick cancer’s ass”. I very nicely asked it to leave. Aggressive words weren’t allowed. For example: the word chemo is scary, so I wouldn’t have “chemo days”. I had “treatment days”.

THE PLAN

Executing THE PLAN has been my #1 project for the last 6 months. My clients have been very understanding about that and they have been amazing. I was able to keep a decent work load because my side effects were mild and manageable. Never any nausea, a couple infection scares, but no major complications during my treatments.

My treatments were suspended in early June due to encroaching neuropathy in my fingers and toes. They tell me that this happens often. THE PLAN was for 16 treatments, and I had 12 of them. Despite the shortfall, good work had been done. My tumor had decreased 30% and the lymph node 60% (down to normal size). Next was surgery - I had a lumpectomy and lymph node dissection. A few days later, my surgeon called with the results with talk of “margins” and “dissections”…and my husband cut to the chase - “when can we call her “cancer-free’?”. She replied, “Right now”.

We celebrated, but I still had a lot of healing to do. I’m six weeks past surgery and nerves in the area are still protesting the disruption, but otherwise, everything has healed wonderfully. I’ve just started radiation, which should be complete on September 29th - the ultimate “Wellness Wednesday”.

Almost three months after chemo I still have some neuropathy in my fingers and toes, but they are slowly getting better. And my fingernails don’t look so hot - but they are growing out. So is my hair. A crew cut isn’t my aesthetic, but it will have to do for now. I see many “bad hair days” in my future, but my husband says there are no bad hair days as long as I have hair. I look forward to the day when everything sorts itself out.

What Comes Next?

During this time I wasn’t seeking out new clients, but was well able to keep my existing ones going. My business was kind of “on idle”, I guess. I look forward to stepping on the gas with some new clients. And I think I’ll also be writing a book about all this. I had been doing a caringbridge.org journal to keep everyone up to date on what was going on with me - so I wouldn’t have to repeat all that information to all interested parties. Lo and behold - people were entertained by my medical crisis. OK - obviously they weren’t entertained by the crisis, but the way I wrote about it.

Over the last couple years I have been working with an editor - I do book covers for her clients. I also wrote some articles for a magazine she worked on. I even wrote a chapter for an anthology this year! Let’s call all this a “sign”. :)

A book might help someone. I had Reiki sessions all through this process to keep the healing energy flowing and my mind calm. My practitioner (Carla at soultosolepgh.com) has worked with many cancer patients and she said my approach to getting through this was very different than most. So I think we’re going to work on it together. Watch this space and we’ll see what happens. Now that I’ve put it “out there” the Ravenclaw in me will certainly make it happen.

The Birth of the Harry Potter “Phoenix Tears” Sign

Dumbledore’s Patronus Funko Pop

Dumbledore’s Patronus Funko Pop

During this chapter of my life, I have had almost daily signs from the universe that everything was going to be ok. Some were Harry Potter related. Funko happened to release a “Pop” figure of Dumbledore’s patronus - a phoenix. There were several reasons I bought it:

  1. A patronus keeps away negative energy

  2. According to the books: Phoenix Tears have healing properties

  3. My dad loved birds

  4. My favorite chemo nurse has a dog named Phoenix. (what are the odds?)

I found it a good sign that many of the members of my medical team loved Harry Potter as much as I did. And one of those signs became - literally - a sign.

Midway through my treatments I was talking to a nurse who was headed to “the Wizarding World of Harry Potter” theme park, and I told her to bring back some “Phoenix Tears” for me. I looked up at the saline drip on the IV stand and it occurred to me that saline was salty water… and so were tears.

So I designed a little sign that would hang from the IV stand - proclaiming it to be Phoenix Tears - a Healing Elixir - a potion to be used in combination with muggle (non-magical) medicine to aid in healing.

I hope you never know a Harry Potter fan who could use this, but if you do - click the download button to download it and pass it along with my love, light, thoughts and prayers.